There are some things in life that doesn't rely on how you act alone. There are this unfortunate little devil creeping you out, telling you that you need a dust of ... luck

I hate the way I have to worked up so hard just to gain a small, tiny crackers while this one particular person seems to be totally slack-off but that person scoop big fish. It just not fair to me. I mean, logically with my effort and way of organizing things, it would be my positive. But what in the world could be that person who gain the shit? That's just ridiculous! You don't even understand, do you? WAMAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW TEPLAK

Does it occur to you sometimes that you have all worked up but instead of getting flashy all over, you just get nothing. N-O-T-H-I-N-G.
How stressful it is that you can't blame anyone?

BLERHAKHRAHRAHRLHALHK.


There's also times when I was so regretful of having myself study overnight. I even drank coffee I had never drank before, stayed up all night I had never do (except for surfing the internet), and ... studied things I often pushed the mere thought of it. I especially do the things I never do so that I could have a good remark. But what? Nothing improved. After the test was ended, I found myself almost shed tears over the fact I studied for nothing.

And then I told to myself, not to pay much attention. I thought I would change myself to a better person by paying some attention to stuff but... instead the reality slap me off. And so, I gradually changes back into my old self who didn't really care of some things.

I do really care about some things, but there are also some things I don't really care about. Like when I lost my wallet, lost my card, lost my money, got scolded by teacher or my parents, forgot to bring my book, forgot when the test is, forgot my homework, and so on. Sometimes, I do have to force myself to pay attention to those tings. Because if I don't, then I will not look like living.

Haaa. . . That is nonsense.

///////// gramatical errors:xxx ////////////////


Anyway, I started to look over my RETURN, and I would need some times to post new chapter of it. Hi ha ho hu he.